Rick Rocks ~ Another Grateful Edition

We have a phrase in our family .. "whoa down", as in "you need to whoa down a bit" or "he whoa'd me down when I was freaking out."

Rick has the ability to do that for me. I have mentioned in lots and lots of a few posts that I don't like to be told what to do. I'm pretty sure I'm 'all that', that I have all the wisest answers. Hmmmmm ..... no.

I am a control freak of the greatest proportions, especially when it comes to my kids. I do all things with order and structure, and expect {too often} for everyone else to do the same. As Dr. Phil would say, "How's that workin' for ya?"

I have a teenager (well, actually a couple of them). But the teenager I'm talking about is 16 years old, as of yesterday. And, how-did-this-happen?, she has a life of her own now! And it consists of friends, and boyfriends, and conflicts and other things. And, I'd love nothing more than to micro-manage all of that for her.

But, then I remember how, even as a teenager (especially as a teenager), I didn't like to be told what to do. And I always hated that I wasn't trusted. And I knew I wasn't trusted.

Rick's upbringing was the complete opposite. He had virtually no supervision and no rules. He was completely trusted. (Thankfully he was very responsible and a great kid who didn't fall into any real trouble.)

So, this past weekend when I was upset about a way that Kyndal was handling a situation, I wanted to get all in her business and voice my opinion(s) and take care of things for her. And it was stressing me out. And I was up several times in the night thinking about it. And it's really been bumming me out that she is so content spending so much time away from us. So, I was a little panicked and needed to do something ... now!

And then Rick "whoa'd me down". We had a great talk about typical teenage behavior, and what a great kid Kyndal is, and how she needs to be free to make some of her own mistakes while the stakes are still low in her life, and how as a teenager I hated to be untrusted and micro-managed and how I am allowing her to grow and mature by just staying out of some things and how she needs to learn how to navigate some of her relationships on her own.

It was hard, but I took his advice.

And then after the weekend was over, and she was home talking to us, it became clear that she had made some pretty great decisions all on her own. And then when she was really upset about another situation with a family member, I was so glad that I hadn't frustrated her all weekend with my management of her life. Because, it was me she came to, to talk and cry and ask for advice.

Without Rick that probably would have ended up being a completely different situation. He balances me so well and helps take away my panic and helps me to see the bigger picture.

I am so grateful to have him!